Caught between a Rock and a Hard Place
by Karla-Canon
Summary: "That'd better be a kunai in your pocket." Naruto had just smirked. Rated for language/sexual innuendo. No Lemons this time. Friendship/Family based. Slight Hurt/Comfort. Supposed to be somewhat humourous.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Naruto._

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><p>Sakura Haruno liked to think that she had a fairly simple lifestyle. She'd wake up at exactly six-thirty in the morning, clean herself up, change into her typical attire, have two slices of toast for breakfast, and then proceed to fill her day with training with Naruto and working down at the hospital or Hokage tower. A daily schedule that was simple and well organised, much like herself. Occasionally she would be given a mission, usually a Sasuke retrieval mission, so she would have to make slots in her very precise mental timetable to be able to carryout said jobs for her higher power.<br>She, unlike Naruto, would not often complain if she thought that a mission she'd been assigned to was below her skill level, she knew from years of experience that Tsunade was _not_ the type of person you raised your voice to, even if the situation called for it. In fact, it was due to Naruto's larger than average mouth that she was caught in her current... dilemma.

The phrase, '_caught between a rock and a hard place_,' was usually used in a metaphorical sense when describing a problematic situation that had no easy way out, it wasn't a phrase that shouldn't be taken seriously. However, the problem that Sakura found herself caught up in called for all metaphorical links within the phrase to be thrown out of the nearest possible window, as she was literally stuck between a rock and a hard place.

The 'rock' wasn't so much a rock as an entire wall that belonged to the left side of a narrow corridor that Sakura had _insisted_ only one person could fit down at once. But Naruto, being a genius, had also insisted that if they shimmied through the corridor sideways they could easily fit down it next to each other thus, if they were to be attacked, they would not lose someone while the other person stayed oblivious. Sakura wasn't known for being able to put up with Naruto, she could have hit him for making such a suggestion, instead she had humoured his odd and imprecise intellect and decided that, yes, they very well could fit down the corridor together if they went in sideways... that was, until the corridor had gotten increasingly narrower.  
>She hadn't noticed at first as the walls were only tilted about half an inch toward each other, in fact, she hadn't even noticed when Naruto's torso had brushed against her chest, being too busy trying to steady her breathing in a narrow room that seemed to be filtered of all oxygen. However, when the two bodies sliding down opposite walls jammed together, she panicked.<p>

Sakura had spent the first ten minutes of the situation wriggling against Naruto and the wall, as if her building perspiration would be enough to allow her to slide back the way they came and thus become unstuck from Naruto's muscled frame. Then, after feeling something press against her thigh she paused, pushing her smaller frame against the wall to try and distance herself from Naruto.

"That'd better be a kunai in your pocket..."  
>Naruto had just smirked.<br>If she hadn't been pushed against Naruto's steadily hardening erection, and a form she couldn't believe he'd achieved in his two and a half years of training, she could have easily come up with a solution to their problem, being a fairly intelligent woman and a very well trained shinobi.

She wasn't sure whether to be proud or embarrassed. Sexually, she'd never been with another man, so the thought of Naruto, who was only a few years shy of being a fully grown man, being as hard as a rock against her leg, inches away from a part of her body that she'd never touched apart from after having a piss, was absolutely mortifying, she didn't even have the nerve to look up at him. On the other hand, she was quite pleased with herself for being able to turn on the blond in front of her, having never been able to do it before hand... not that she'd tried...

"You're _such_ a virgin..." Naruto purred, looking down at the short pink hair just below his chin.

Sakura, after finding the balls to reply, proceeded to push her leg forward into Naruto's crotch, seemingly innocently, in a way she hoped wouldn't get him anymore excited, "Stop acting like you're not..."

"I trained for two and a half _years_ with Jiraiya... he wanted my sixteenth birthday to be special," Naruto replied, visibly wincing from the pressure put on his cock.

"Th-That's disgusting!"

Naruto, having _always_ been the type of person to push Sakura's patience, snickered in a way that displayed his teeth and replied, "God, I'm joking, like I'd sleep with someone I didn't know."

Naruto was very prideful; he had a lot more self-respect than he used to have as well as a high respect for other people. Sakura almost felt bad for insinuating that Naruto, of all people, would be the type of person to dirty himself in such a manner.

"Stop talking we need to conserve oxygen..." It was a lame reply, and she knew it, but Naruto was only ever bright when it came to hand to hand combat, etcetera, so maybe he wouldn't bother gracing her with a reply.  
>He didn't, instead he wiggled a little, shifting his entire form higher then sucking in his gut to slide slightly left to free the one of the hands Sakura had got caught between them when she'd reached them forward to adjust her shirt before being effectively trapped against his body.<p>

"Think you can smash through one of these walls? Get us un-trapped."

'_Yeah, probably...'_ Was what was _supposed_ to come out of her mouth, instead her brain opted for, "What if I don't wanna?"

Thankfully, Naruto missed it, probably not having heard the double meaning behind the woman's words, "Uh... why _wouldn't_ you?"

"Because I like being pressed against you..."  
>Clearly Sakura's brain wasn't on the best of terms with her mouth.<p>

As unmanly as it made him seem, Naruto actively blushed from head to toe, making a noise between a cough and an uncertain chuckle, not having expected Sakura Haruno, the girl he'd been crushing on since their days back in the academy, to openly admit to _liking_ sharing his body heat... and sweat, but he wasn't about to admit to being a nervous sweater out loud.  
>Stumbling over his words he managed a: "When we get out of here you can press against me all you want."<p>

"...You got that from Kiba didn't you?" Sakura didn't seem taken back by his comment, that had come out of his mouth _unwillingly_, so that was a good start to making the situation less awkward... if only slightly.

"Well, his version was... _dirtier_, but, yeah."

"Do you get _all_ your hook-up lines from Inuzuka?"

"...no."

"Right... well, uh, I guess we should get outta here, might wanna watch your head," Sakura stated, pulling her fist back until her elbow hit the wall behind her and then thrusting it forward awkwardly to tear up the wall behind Naruto, who had closed his eyes as if it'd be enough to protect them.

After they'd got out of that problem, and realised that they had gone completely off course, the building they had just smashed out of not being on the mission description _at all_, they spent two hours running themselves to the ground and stealing awkward glances at each other.

When they found the building they were looking for, a small cottage-like building that looked like it hadn't been built by a professional hand, they rasped on the door twice, being careful as the object didn't properly fit it's frame.  
>Sakura handed the package entrusted to her by lady Tsunade earlier that morning to the small old man that opened the shacks door, they were then given a smile and had the door slammed in their faces.<br>Naruto had expressed how much he wanted to kick the old mans arse with a string of obscenities and an _'I'll be Hokage someday, than I'm gonna come back for you, old-fart!'  
><em>Neither was effective.

The walk back had been awkward; the only action between the two was Sakura slapping Naruto rasher harshly across the face after his outburst.

"I can't believe you got... _hard_ having me _move_ against you," Sakura muttered, red faced, half an hour into their walk.

"In my defence, you weren't just _movin'_ you were _wigglin'..._ pressed against my dick too," Naruto mumbled back, embarrassed more by the fact that he was cussing in front of his long-term crush than having been rock hard against her less than three hours ago. "Besides, I'm a guy... we get _excited_ when we get excited, it was probably just the mission."

"Yeah, because being delivery monkeys is _thrilling_!" Sakura announced, sarcastically, volume picking up slightly.

"I'm _tryin'_ to make this conversation less awkward!"

"Naruto, calm down, I'm not a kid anymore... neither are you, it's fine. I get it."

Sakura really _did_ get it, and Naruto did too. They weren't kids, Naruto's childish crush was more than simple affection - he didn't just like her for what she looked like anymore. He'd grown up more in the two and a half years he'd been away than any other ninja that was part of Rookie Nine; he was a completely different person. He wasn't a brainwashed teen who insisted that because they had a girlfriend or a boyfriend they were _'in love.' _He knew better than anyone how to distinguish feelings from each other - he knew love from hate and friendship from deceit, he'd had equal tastes of all of them. He knew that what he felt for Sakura went well beyond, '_You're pretty, and therefore I love you,'_ he was sexually attracted to the girl as well as adoring her personality and her drive to fight for what she wanted and become stronger to protect those who once protected her. He wanted Sakura more than he'd ever wanted a woman in his life...

"I get it, Naruto. But... I can't return the same feelings, we've been through this. I'm not going to treat you like you have some sort of disease anymore; I recognise that you like me-"

"_Love_ you... if you want to be grown up about this then you have to acknowledge my feelings properly." He stopped walking, allowing Sakura to walk slightly further ahead, a silent method of telling her that he wasn't going to stop her from running away if that was what she wanted.

"-I know that you _love_ me, Naruto, and I believe it, I know how much more grown up you are. I won't run away from you anymore Naruto, but... I don't love you back. At least, not in the same way, I know I said some pretty misleading things back their, but It was awkward; I didn't really mean it... I love you, but more like a brother. Naruto, you'll always be kinda like a big brother to me... I don't want that to change."

Naruto gave Sakura a dejected smile; he knew Sakura didn't fancy him like he did her. It was written across her face, in her body language and behind her eyes, she couldn't have said it any clearer... she didn't _need_ to say it any clearer. Naruto hated people who lied to themselves, so he was happier that Sakura would accept just that tiny bit of the love he had for her than fool herself into thinking that she wanted to accept it all. He was happy being her big brother... it was enough; at least he could be there for her.

"Lets head back, it's getting late." Sakura turned and waited for Naruto to reach her side before she fell into step with him.

Despite the conversation they'd just shared the walk back to the village had been rather loud and 'full of joie de vivre,' as one might say. Though, it was a shame Tsunade wasn't full of the same when they got to her office. She was _angry_ that a mission that should have taken maybe two to three hours had taken around five or six. Wasn't Sakura's fault that Naruto had taken shortcuts... that ended up being _longer_ than the long way.

"Well, I'm waiting! Why did such a simple mission take so long!"

"We got... _stuck,"_ Sakura offered.

"Stuck where?"

"Between a rock and a hard place."

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><p>Wasn't that end like fucking GENIUS!<br>No?  
>Urh, this is a little somthin' just to grease up the ol' fingertips. I can't write oneshots to save my life, whatever I write tends to go on and on and <em>on,<em>until I've reach chapter seventy something and the story line has become that shit that it sound something like, _'And then the fairy-unicorn ate his face, The End.'  
><em>So, because I'm like, ALBERT EINSTIEN (is that how you spell his name?), I'm attepting to perfect, or better, my skills at simple oneshots before going on to anything serious.  
>I made this decision after getting to chapter two of <em>Stimulation<em> and realising, 'Fuck, I don't know what I'm doing,' So... if any of you are interested you can go to my profile and check out two chapters of a muti-chap FF that makes NO sense because I've introduced a shit-boat of people that aren't even _in_ the anime - we're talking Naruto here - and haven't got around to the whole, _'this person rapes that person and he falls in love with this other guy, and she's a lesbian and likes boobs, and these following people die, **blahhhhhhhhhhhh**'_ soooo... yeah.  
>This is just to test certain things, I don't care if you dont like the storyline, or Sakura or Naruto, because this is literally to test my ability at serious situations, maybe a little humour, but idk cause i'm not all that funny, onesided romance and the whole '<em>Yaaaaahhhh we're best firends! -lick face-' <em>and to try and sway away from Sakura being all '_RAAAAAHHHH I'M SMART AND HAVE THE STRENGTH OF ONE THOUSAND HIPPOS FEAR MEEEEE!' _and to get away from Naruto's cliche '_I'M A MOTHERFUCKING DICKHEAD THAT SAYS "BELIEVE IT" FAR TOO FUCKING MUCH, I'M ALSO HAVE ABSOLUTLY NO SEX DRIVE, EVEN THOUGH I'M SIXTEEN AND I TRAINED WITH THE PERVY-SAGE FOR OVE TWO YEARS. RAAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEENNNN!'_

You have no idea how crazy I feel right now...  
>Awsome Author's note is Awesome.<br>R&R if you wish, give constructive crisicism. Tell me you love me, you'll get cyber cookies... the good ones, not the spyware ones. -shakes head in disapporval of viruses-  
>Tell me what you like, tell me what you hated.<br>**Remember! **If you're going to give critisicm you're looking at sentence-structure, grammer, vocabulary, etc. (I'm British! So take that into consideration when you look at how I've spelt certain things)

Love y'all!


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